As I observe my behaviour, my habits, inner attitudes and beliefs I note that the hold of conditioning is strong. And despite my assumption that I am open, flexible and a receptive person I see that this is not always so; and that I can see and feel my resistance and an inner rigidity to many stimuli that crop up in my daily life.
 
I have decided to observe this aspect of my physical, emotional and mental make-up carefully. I understand that if I wish to enhance my ability to receive the higher energy and be in tune with the energy of the universe around me, my own instrument needs to become less bounded, more permeable and more transparent.
 
My observations, however, show me that resistance inhibits the flow of energy but it is necessary in the right context. For instance, in electrical circuitry resistance is a measure of the opposition to current flow in an electrical circuit. So, conductors have very little resistance and allow the electrical flow to happen freely while insulators prevent the flow. The higher the resistance, the lower the current flow.
 
Even at the biological level the force of the blood being pumped from the heart meets resistance from the blood vessels to regulate the flow and the pressure of the blood. There is resistance in water, in the currents of air; and plants and animals show a form of resistance when they curl up and close to external stimuli deemed dangerous for their existence.
 
So to feel resistance is only natural for the human organism. I think it plays the role of a defence mechanism to protect itself and maintain the status quo. At the same time, it pushes the human organism to compete with and dominate other species  for its own self perpetuation- “co-nativity”. It’s the impulse that moves all living things to preserve and increase their own self-existence.
 
But, biologists and environmentalists point out “in nature, this drive is qualified by the principle of least resistance: Organisms which conserve their energy by adapting their ends as far as possible to the ends or organisms surrounding them will be naturally selected over organisms which needlessly provoke resistance and competition from others”
 
If that is so, then the question that needs to be explored is “what in me goes against this sense of least resistance, accommodation and flow.”? When, why and how do I recognize resistance in myself? This has been my inquiry in quiet work over the past weeks and here are some of my observations based on what I have understood from closely examining resistance at the physical, emotional and mental levels in my body-mind complex.
 
When I examine my daily habits I note that there is great comfort in the learned and repetitive nature of all habits and rituals. Any attempt to change these is immediately met with both physical and emotional resistance. The breaking of familiar codes of behaviour and disrupting one’s comfort zone is not pleasing sensorially or emotionally. The mind intervenes with rational or emotional justifications to retain these habits and not change. Not only are my mechanical habits being disrupted but the meaning I ascribe to these habits is also being challenged. Consequently, something in me clings to the status quo and fights and resists flow, transformation or change.
 
How I clean, order my life, cook, eat, sleep, maintain my environment has a repetitive comfort about it which often I am loath to change. The other day my husband wished to raise all the blinds from the windows to get a clear view of the outside. I felt immediate resistance as I like some shades down to give the home a warm and cosy feel. As I watched the need to deny this request well up in my system I also noticed the resistance of my status quo and then, acquiesced. This is just one example of the small resistances that crop up regularly.
 
I realize that by staying with or justifying the status quo I am also strengthening the inflexibility or rigidity of my inner attitudes and beliefs. My cultural conditioning has created and fed my beliefs over the years. It has taught me to judge, to like/dislike, have a moral opinion about things being good or evil, right or wrong, appropriate or inappropriate. Every action, feeling and thought of mine is coloured by this learnt conditioning. Breaking free evokes a sense of discomfort. I feel something of myself is being denied, dented or disregarded.  How will the self (personality) survive, be in control and be dominant if I do not have these habits, rituals, beliefs and points of view that currently give structure and weight to the material me and the material world I live in?
 
I am clear now that all resistance exists at the level of the personality and it is our conditioned response to preserve the ego and the status quo. What forms of resistance have I noted in my being?
 
I note that any form of conclusion is a resistance. It results in a dogmatic, “I know it all” position. It results in argument and creates a sense of superiority that my conclusions are the right ones. I feel resistance when any of my beliefs are challenged. After all, the edifice of my life in this world is built on these beliefs. No matter how pragmatic I think I am, I do have beliefs that are dear to me. And these pop up at inconvenient moments as judgments.
 
I realize that any form of like or dislike is, in fact, a form of resistance. Personally, I think I have few dislikes but I have many likes and when I do not get what I like I feel resistance. Any form of choice is also resistance. You think that choice is your right and your freedom so not being given a choice creates resistance. But in reality this freedom is notional.
 
Any form of change is also met with resistance. Whether it is changing familiar habits, accepting the unusual or the unexpected, accommodating someone else’s way and their habits all evoke some degree of resistance. It’s because we are eager to have the comfort of our own way.
 
Any form of boundedness is resistance. It prevents a free flow of energy. Our physicality is so identified with a bounded and definitive material form of our body that one is not able to see one’s porosity. Nor are we able to enjoy our non-material bodies that vitally, also co-exist.
 
Any form of morality is also a form of resistance. It evokes judgment and rejection of that which does not fit with our moral code. Particularly in the sphere of political morality I can see my inability to accept the politics of a Modi or a Trump. I can see my judgmental side in full flow.
 
Any form of classification, categorization is a resistance as it does not find uncertainty and difference comforting.
Any form of me-centeredness is resistance as anything that does not feed it is met with resistance.

As Krishnamurthi says, “Is not my whole life, a way of resistance? I think I am somebody, I have an image of myself and I don’t want you to destroy that image. Or I have various forms of beliefs, dogmas, knowledge, experiences, which have given me certain vitality, strength and technique to tackle life and I am going to resist everything else.”

I find that there are some states and contexts which are free from resistance. The feeling of love, gratitude, compassion and awe. All are characterized by a sense of unity and a sense of flow; and there is no feeling of being separate from the universe or from others. These are feelings of flow where the energy flows easily without identification: from the organism to the cosmos and vice versa.
 
At such moments, the ‘usual me’ is insignificant in the vastness of creation. But at the same time the ‘usual me’ also knows that this creation has a definite place and role for it, and that the integrity of the cosmos is dependent on me playing the part assigned to me.
 
In these moments I know nothing, yet my awe and curiosity help me see and experience deeper levels of my reality and my being. Insights present themselves and I am in a zone of another kind of knowledge and wisdom.
 
The realization comes that I am not the doer, but a lot can be done through me as long as I work with a higher will. In moments of flow I accommodate, receive, accept, and coexist with all other forms of energy, to be nourished and renewed by them.
 
I let go of thought, memories, and actions that arise out of beliefs, inner postures. For the outer personality with its rigidities and inflexibilities it is critical to experience relaxation, equilibrium and balance. Tensions and holding on to resistance feed fears, insecurities, self-centeredness, and the arrogance of knowledge. Only in a relaxed state can one let go of these rigidities and feelings of resistance.
 
I need to allow something subtler and higher than me to do its work within and through me. Accepting uncertainty, daily dying to my usual self to be born every day with a new form of energy that is getting finer and finer is also a way of enhancing my receptivity and inner flexibility.

Being able to feel the silence between the breaths, the space between two thoughts, the rhythms of the body, the flow of prana into the body, the energy from other forms of life are all signals that some of my channels of receptivity are indeed open and all I must do is to try and be in such states as often as I can.
 
“The Highest Form of Virtue” in verse 38 of the Tao Te Ching, where Lao tzu tells us: 
The practice of Wu Wei is the expression of what in Taoism is considered to be the highest form of virtue—one that is in no way premeditated but arises spontaneously.
The highest virtue is to act without a sense of self. The highest kindness is to give without a condition. The highest justice is to see without a preference. When Tao is lost one must learn the rules of virtue.When virtue is lost, the rules of kindness.When kindness is lost, the rules of justice, When justice is lost, the rules of conduct.

Meena Kaushik